My Aha Month

It started out mediocre. Sure, I loved the newborn nursery--who can't resist the warm and cuddly babies, swaddling, letting them suck on your finger to quiet them and talking about how breastmilk is one of the best things on earth? :) Intermediate care (step-down from the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) was not terrible but we were mostly just making sure preemies were growing; it was like gardening, really. But not enough action for me.

Clinic picked up the pace. Pediatric clinic is fun because the kids aren't interested in spending the whole day there so they're not talking your ears off (ahem, some adults). And when their parents were the ones talking your ears off, you silently thank your blessings you're dealing with anxious parents and not totally negligent parents...And then heme/onc clinic. Wow, what an awesome clinic. I fell in love. I saw 16 year old kids who had leukemia when they were 3 and doing perfectly fine, a 4 year old getting chemo in the clinic, kids getting bone marrow biopsies and intrathecal methotrexate, a 16 year old with ITP who had been menstrual bleeding for 30+ days (sound familiar??), kids with chronically low WBC counts with super rare genetic disorders...I mean I was just fascinated by the variety and the severity of the illnesses...that and in heme/onc clinic, any kid you see might need to be admitted to the hospital that hour.

Ah and then the wards. I loved my patients. I seriously loved seeing my kids pre-rounding. One of my post-op heart surgery patients, a 9 month old, was pretty fussy with the rest of the doctors, but I would spend a couple minutes with him first, letting him play with my stethoscope and pet his cute head and make him feel loved, before I examined him; it was a special 10 minutes I had with him. I loved talking to him and telling him he looks just like his mother who I knew wouldn't be back in the hospital until 9 am or so. Or my 6 year old kid who told me he loved me when he wished me good night. Or the thankful grandma of my 1 yr old girl who was being ruled out for TB since I was the main person from the team letting them know the plan for the day and what we are thinking. Not only did I love my patients but I LOVED their diseases. Prader-Willi, Citrobacter brain abscess, idiopathic severe IVH in a full-term baby, CF, all types of cardiac abnormalities, Cushing disease, Schwachman-Diamond, Langerhans cell histiocytosis, much more.

My Healer's Art mentor back when I was a first year (oh so long ago) told me that I had a special gift for children and that he knew I wouldn't waste that. Well, I think I've found my calling. Physician to our little ones and young ones. I can't wait :)